oh yeah...I was here LAST December!

There is something about coming full circle, landing again on this date in this season and I remember late December last year I started this project with great seriousness and here it comes again. My body remembers this date, the chair, this angel of the lampshade…the feel of nighttime and the sound of the keys. My goal was to write here every night, even if only for a few minutes. The project: The 4th Dog.

I haven’t kept up writing every night, though I still stay up quite late…crawling into bed at 2 or 3 and reading until I can’t read any longer. I am easily thrown off; my rituals are fragile. Some of them. Any change in routine can tip me over just enough to make me lose my footing and then I need to wander around until I find my footprints again. This time Maudie herself was pouring…


The other night was Solstice night at the P and J’s farm; a gathering of farm families and friends who come together around a makeshift jam of tables and folding chairs (that reminds me of Passover Seders and after Sabbath service kiddish…food food food—casseroles and cooked vegetables coming out from under tin foil, meat sliced, wine poured, the rituals of speech, deserts. The lighting of candles, the acknowledgement of the earth in space.) Everyone says what they valued most about the year and then blows out their candle until all the candles are out and the room is dark…on the longest night of the year---then the circle starts again with hopes for the next year, the candles are re-lit and we lean towards spring.

So in that spirit… I think about this last year, the journey (can I say trip instead?) that took me to Monmouth to get Maudie, the 4th dog herself, and where we are today.

First. I have this little mountain of pages that have piled up despite my distractions. On them I have not only chronicled thoughts and activities but I became a writer again. And I think maybe a better writer, my sense of economy and directness winning out over the baroque seductions of language itself as often as not. (Editing is fun. Although blogs aren’t very conducive to it…)
It remains the challenge. But I have come to treasure the adjective-less sentence…. even when I forget to build them myself. I even cut back a few metaphors that wound around the foundation of thought like kudzu---yuk yuk--- But that’s another story…thought and metaphor. I still hold that metaphor is how I know what I think.

Last year this time I was all glowy about Sonny’s first 2 CD legs—we acquit ourselves so very nicely in the ring. I didn’t think it would take a whole year to get the 3rd and final leg…but I got busy and we developed a little bit of a problem with “stay.” But neither did I think that a year later I would be all shiny again sitting across the room from where an enormous purple and gold ribbon hangs on the wall. (see HIT!!)

And Maudie. Me and Maudie. We start work next month in the library as a READ team. Reading Education assistance Dog. Less than a year it took to find each other and work to get certified to do therapy work. By both Dove Lewis and the Delta Society (well…once I send the fees in to Delta) Any day now Maudie’s special yellow DLAATE band should arrive. (The one she will wear on our outings). Wow. That and our work in Ellie’s class is going so well…we have fun together. I think the mixture of Maudie’s sensitivity and stability is a good combination for me.

And more. I didn’t know how much she would change my own life…how she would help me rebuild my physical strength. I went from barely being able to get down the street before my muscles would hurt, to being able to walk a lesuire mile in around 12 minutes. That includes 3 hills. PLUS. It was for Maudie that I got the bicycle, so I could go fast enough to help her sustain a trot, and here I am buying Gore-Tex and Merino wool so I can continue to ride through the winter and reading books about Lance Armstrong. It’s no longer about the big dog…. it’s about the bike. And the big dog.

blogroll

As a link lover...links are, after all, the way to surprise and discovery, a map for the treasure hunt, the spiral path into the core of the www....I am always on the lookout for interesting blogs to roll with. I am keen on finding more collie blogs, more writers' and artists' dog blogs, and yeah, cyclist blogs.

HIT!!!!!

Sonny and I finally finished our CD title… having one shot at one trial at the Toy Show because I taught the last class of the term on the day of the other trial, and because the all breed show this weekend isn’t offering obedience…

And we did it going High in Trial!!!!!!!!!!!! We had the highest score of any dog competing in all the obedience classes. 195 points out of 200. Sonny rocks… Rosalie Alvarez was our judge, and she was wonderful to work under. She struck me as calm, funny and genuinely invested in the sport and its participants, both new and old. I had been worried because we couldn't enter Thursday's trial under Pam Weaver, also a very good, fair, kind judge, who gave Flynnie her first leg (you need 3). And I knew nothing about Alvarez.

PLUS! I was almost ready to throw in the towel because Sonny kept leaping up from his down stay as I returned to heel position at the end of the long down…and you fail if your dog gets up before you are securely back in heel position. In the spring at both trials in Albany, he got up on his long down….and the problem seemed to be getting worse. But we worked calmly over the last 2 weeks and the little scamp did it! I beamed him sleepy vibes from across the ring, and he put his head down finally and stayed put until those blessed words Exercise finished that come after the longest 3 minutes I know of.

My fault. I didn't get him out enough to work in new places, and I think living with Maudie has made him super foot conscious. But his good genes sparkled, Ellie's (teacher and coach) wise council prevailed, I hung in there and whaddyaknow...


I feel, I don't know, validated. Some people never get a High in Trial in their whole obedience careers. After years and years of training, I feel like maybe I'm not such a slouch.

It sure helps to look down and see that sweet, eager, willing face looking back up at me.

I am so proud of him.

getting started...

Been so busy and the moments have been piling up. Sometimes it’s a little overwhelming to think about capturing them all, having the presence of mind to do them justice, holding them still long enough to remember what stirred at the center.

But winter has announced herself with her great gusts of wind, her gowns and trains of rain, her icy jewels. When winter comes I am always moved to write more; it just takes signing that document with my air pen.you know, the one you sign on the invisible contract, the one that holds you to your daily promise.

But that’s nothing to do with it, is it.

So. Maudie and I have our ID badges and our first assignment in January, which is in the Read to the Dogs program at the Capitol Hill Library. And the nursing home around the corner wants teams, so I’m waiting to catch a moment to go meet the director and look around.

It’s true. Everyone wants to work with kids and there are boxes and boxes of buildings filled with elderly people---ew, coming smack up against the need for different words: elderly people, nursing home….
who sit and wait. Puppies and kittens always get adopted first….

I feel pretty sure that Maudie herself would like to work with older people, so we’ll look for a place we can go to for them. I want to try and work both ends of the time line and we’ll see what starts to shake loose as our best fit.

Pokey Update

Yup, that’s right…another pokey update. I was down with a nasty cold for about a week and put off Maudie’s vet appointment. We need to get a wellness check, then go to Dove Lewis to get “our papers” and talk about assignments.

The test itself. I’m not sure I addressed that yet. What I will remember is a beautiful sunny day in a parking lot behind a business park in Hillsboro, power lines framing the view, long low storage buildings filling the role of small storefronts. I ran Maudie up and back on the tarmac to relax us both, reminded her not to pull on her leash and we went and signed in.

There was a closed circuit camera in the test space airing on a tv set in the waiting room. It was impossible to really watch, so we sat and waited. And while we waited we watched dog after dog come out the door they went in, meaning they didn’t get through to the end.

I don’t think I really doubted us; and we were both in playful moods.
I was a little nervous, but I always remember that by the time we get there—the test site, the show ring—we are as ready as we are, no more, no less and all we can do now is show up, stay calm and try to have fun. After all, we are together and that’s the whole point, to be spending time with my dog.

Once in the room—a doggie daycare playground---Maudie became distracted and a little worried, but I kept focused and worked to keep her with me. It was a little hard because our tester explained every little part of the exercise after I had been studying the minutae for years already and I wanted to get on with it and not stand there trying to listen. I felt pretty obnoxious and impatient, but I also know that if we keep moving we can stay more focused. Of course, doing therapy work involves a lot of sitting around and being patient…but not under the same kind of pressure.

Maudie was Maudie despite her “float” and that means, stalwart, sweet and trying to do what was asked, but I could tell that she was only about one third present. It wasn’t a solid performance, but I think enough of our energy came to the surface to indicate that we are truly a capable team…and so we made it.

After the test, we sat and chatted with our tester and she took our photo and we left. A woman with a labradoodle was also in the “passed room” and I’m not sure I could say if anyone else ended up getting that far. I don’t know.

I was supremely happy and proud. And I even had the presence of mind to get air in the tire I was almost sure was going to go flat on the way TO the test.

Maudie was tired and M & I went and test rode some steel bikes with dropped bars, learned a lot about what size I needed and then went home and took a long nap….

Maudie and I went for a bike ride in the afternoon. I became aware of the long fingers of a virus sneaking into my capillaries. Even so I spent the next 4 days riding steel road bikes, bought a Jamis Aurora and then collapsed. I slept for 3 days.

Sad News

(photo: Jancada Tender O’Kings Valley, R.O.M., dam of 14 Champions - top producing dam and held that record for over 20 years. b12-28-73, d.7-31-84)

I learned this morning that Eva Rappaport, the matriarch of Kings Valley Collies, passed away yesterday at home.
We only met Eva a few times, but each time were mighty impressed with her energy and vision, as an artist, trainer, breeder and lover of collies. The few times we spent together were intense with energy and conversation as we had so much to share, especially as artists and lovers of collies. I always regretted the fact that we were unable to make it to the 2 social occasions at KV to which we were invited: a Passover seder and Eva's birthday...and actually they both might've been the same one. I felt so honored to have been invited. But I feared, had we gone, that I would have been unable to join any conversation NOT about collies. Kings Valley, with its' long narrow gravel entrances is like Disneyland to me, even the gates hum with portent and promise.

The last time we saw her was the day we took the papillons down to KV to meet Maudie and make sure she could be our collie. (that story appears in an earlier entry). Eva was housebound and in a wheelchair and as we entered the house from the yard, I was overwhelmed with an urge to hug her. Despite the fact that she had been through so much physical trauma, it seemed to me that not an ounce of her strength was gone. Perhaps she had softened a little, but that might've been my perception of what was her willingness to share my wide open happiness. We shared the joy and excitement; both Eva and Leslie understood what it meant that I was finally going to have a collie again, and such a splendid collie "in her prime" Eva said, at that.
And when it comes down to it, I think that that is what made me want a KV collie above all others; Eva's deep acknowledgement of the collie soul.
I hope that as Eva's soul journeys onwards, she will be met with the music of all the collies that have been waiting for her, and they will surround her with joy.
Here on earth, we have Leslie and the collies to carry on the legacy.

We Did It!!!

More later....but for those who are checking...we passed the Delta Society/ Dove Lewis Pet Partners certification test today!
I have wanted this day for so long!

tommorrow: the certification test

The night before has arrived. I have thought about this for so long and tommorrow will be our official entry. Maudie and I may not be seasoned, but we're ready: clean, willing and ready to roll. Wish us luck!!

If I had any sense I'd quite eating chocolate bars and go to bed! The best thing I could do now is get a good night's sleep. But I'm obsessed wth steel road bikes...and the internet is a vortex of information...!!

IE Lab

We just got a summation of the notes the volunteer "patients" took about us at the lab:

You and Maudie were golden! Aside from asking Maudie to go a bit longer than she was available for, you two did a great job. I’ve nothing more to add!

Sounds like we did ok! And I'm glad that I was already conscious of Maudie's limits...makes me feel smart.;-)

The Meantime. A Lull.

I keep having this vague sense of some impending task that sits heavy and jagged. I’m not sure what it is. It could be that I need to clean the house, or it could be the certification test, or the In service day at work. Or watching the Red Sox game and anticipating the World Series. (The Red Sox always get me so charged up, and I'm not sure I like begin that excited...!!!) Or that my bike, again, with the new longer Brooks saddle and Albatross bars needs adjusting.

M and I went for a 7.5 mile ride today on the Springwater Corridor. What a great ride, but I was squirming and fidgeting trying to get comfortable; need to change the seat and bar angles.

When we got home I took Maudie out for her run. We have to find another place to run nearby because they’re about to rip up the street –again-- for sewer work. Maybe I should tackle the necessary hills to bike with her to the park. There is a big off lead, fenced in area she could run in. Then bike back. We’d both be in turbo shape …

Tomorrow in class we can work on stay and loose lead walking. Usually she ambles along right next to me, but when she’s excited, she gets distracted (d’uh) and pulls. Her stay has been improving steadily.

I should take her lots of places over the next 2 weeks to work in new and distracting situations. I should be doing that all the time, it’s just that since school started again, I tend to stay home on the days I don’t teach, so I’m not going as many places as I did in the summer. Still,
there’s Home Depot and Pet Smart…both pretty near by. (Is there anywhere left where they aren’t near by??)

Sometime this week we should get a written summary of notes all the volunteers we “visited” took on Saturday. I think they’ll be positive.

But you don’t know what you don’t know. We all have blind spots.

Notes on the Equipment Lab

Maudie is stretched out in a corner of the kitchen asleep. Occasionally she utters one of her big rattling sighs. She’s tired.
I’m tired too and feel a little unmoored. So much energy has been focused on getting to and through the lab, and now it’s over. The actual test is in 2 weeks. I assume we will get the nod to move toward certification.

I’m thinking about using these categories as a way to log our experience:
-Memorable Moments
-What I Learned
-Things to Work On
-Things We Did Well
-Notes about Names and Facilities

Memorable Moments
I asked Maudie if she would wave to the volunteer and made the wave signal I use with Tartuffe the Senegal and Flynn: palm vertical and still, fingers together and bouncing up and down. Maudie lifted her paw—the way she always does, as if to shake hands, and as it falls, it looks alike a wave. She did it consistently. We have a great trick! Especially handy for this work.

Near the very end, when we were in the “community room” and she had begun to turn off, we went to sit down together. I put her on a down and she lay looking up at me and wagging her tail as I talked to her and I could feel our bond so strongly.

What I Learned
Several people responded strongly to her as a collie. This creates an instant bond.

Maudie was uncomfortable with one person—the small darting person who kept scooting closer, peering directly at and under her and talking about the people in the walls while looking for her lost dog Buckley. Oddly enough, I felt not only OK, but intrigued. I don’t know if it was OK to accept her version of things…like agreeing to look out for the people in the walls by walking in the middle of the hallway. I kept trying to direct her attention away from Maudie.

She shut down during our second to last of 15 visits by turning her back to the person, refusing her attempts to get her attention. She did take a treat from her though. This was the woman who has a service dog and trains service dogs for others. She is one of the original volunteers in this program. Maudie’s response was very like it was with HT, the director.
She responded very well to the woman in the wheelchair (who I also liked. She was sad and sweet and lonely), and none of the equipment bothered her at all. The beep beep machine made her want to investigate.

She rallied for the very last visit and then spent the few minutes there lying facing the woman.

So far then, she’s good for about a half hour and likes gentle calm, people. She did like the teenager who read to her. She likes girls. I wish we had had more opportunity to visit with children.

She probably is not a candidate for unpredictable environments.
She responds well to my encouragement.
Driving home I felt a flash of anger at another driver. I understand this as a stress response…it was a lot to take in at once.

What I Need to Work On
-Keeping a loose lead by asking for her attention more consistently.
-Watching that she doesn;t paw people.
-Keeping the visits (myself) calm and giving us both breaks.
-Brushing her out REALLY well. There were collie filaments floating all over the place…


Things We Did Well
Overall I felt that we did quite well and everyone responded positively to us. We were a team and for the most part, both of us were present, personable and relaxed. (Until we got tired.)

Equipment Lab

It is pouring and the sky is so dark we need lights on in the house. In an hour Maudie and I will leave for the lab at Dove Lewis.

Yesterday I took her to a self serve dog wash for her bath; she didn’t have much fun, but boy is she clean and pretty! Her coat is turning that rich mahogany and the fur along the ridge on her back is slowly turning black. My favorite coat color for a collie…Her ruff and paws are sparkling white. Up top is a photo of her grandfather, Ch Twin Oaks High Plains Drifter, also a mahogany sable.

I am nervous! I know it’s not a test, but my perverse imagination is running amok: I picture her refusing to get on the elevator, or tuning out and turning her back on everyone. Offering a big No thank you all around.

The disciplined imagination pictures ease, success, relaxed laughter and perfect interactions. But when you’ve pledged, as a writer, to excavate the darkest ravines of your psyche…a well-mannered imagination is not at all what you cultivate…

So once again…I find myself with a foot in two worlds…..sigh.

Once I arrive, I am sure I will rise to the occasion; after all, I am a member of a team, AND the leader of the team. I can do that.

New Squidoo Page on Cycling with your Dog

I am making a page with tips on cycling with your dog. I will include reviews of available equipment and tips for getting started safely. CLick on title of this post for a link.

Handler Training

Last Saturday from 8am -5pm I spent at Dove Lewis in a handler-training seminar. There was quite a large group of us, maybe 30 people, and made up mostly of women with retrievers. One person was working with a cat. Australian Shepherd/border collie crosses weighed in with 2, also a Bouvier, a beagle, an English setter, Chihuahua, a pit bull mix. Many of the retrievers, most of which are Labs, are guide dog almosts.

There were no animals there, but I remember people’s dogs from their introductions.

We talked about proactive handling, Dove Lewis, hospital protocol and decorum, and preparation for the certification test. A video of Turid Rigas’ on “calming signals” showed some of the more subtle incarnations of dog-dog communication.

Next Saturday, Maudie and I will go to Dove Lewis for more training together. They call it a lab and the 2nd floor of Dove Lewis will be set up as a mock hospital environment. We are to prepare our dogs and ourselves as if for a real visit: dog freshly washed, handler well turned out and equipped.

Although we were reminded several times that this is a lab, not a test, and that we should try to approach it with a relaxed and open state of mind, we will also be evaluated as we go. Copious notes will be taken. So it is not a pressure free hour….and I keep thinking of the lab like a haunted house set up for Halloween.

I have a lot of confidence in both of us though. Maudie is extremely well behaved in public, and she keeps me calm and focused. My conscious “worry” is about my ability to role-play as a mature adult: “Hello Mr. Alzheimer; my name is E and this is Maudie and we’re from Dove Lewis. Would you like us to come in for a visit?”
I want so desperately to appear natural and un self conscious that I get nervous and sometimes when I get nervous I make jokes and laugh inappropriately. But it’s not about me…it’s about us. And I can speak as the manager for the Marvelous Maudie.

Friday I will have to bathe the marvelously furry Maudie, do her nails again, check her teeth, be sure to comb out and untangle her coat. I need to bring the things we would take on a real visit: water, a safe brush (no metal or sharp tines) a collar and lead with no chain, some wipes and bags, a towel, her quilt. A notebook.

Nov 3 is the test. It is the same test that the Delta Society administers and if we pass we can register with them to also be a certified Pet Partner team. If we pass we can begin the work.

Nov 3 is my father’s birthday. He would have been 75… Perhaps from his seat in the Other World, he will help guide us, support my small part for Tikkun Olam (healing of the world).

“It is not your job to fix the whole world, but neither should you shirk your part in the work.” (Talmud)

Here we go.

Riding with Maudie

photo left: http://www.velorution.biz/?page_id=1131

Ye olde OCD has kept me busy setting up my bike, reading about bikes, talking on forums about bikes.and …happily…RIDING my bike. I ride every day and on the weekends, M and I have been exploring the bike paths around town.

There is the ongoing saga of the saddle, although I am committed to my beautiful Brooks B67. I ordered new handlebars so the saddle will be most comfortable.

I’ve also been taking Maudie out. We do .75 miles at a time, and she’s fine, not even winded. One of the concerns when starting out and running on asphalt is keeping mindful of paw abrasions: the pads need to be toughened up slowly. Her paws are sound.

My plan is to take her out 3 x a week and gradually increase the distance, although I am still seeking a good place to ride. We’ve been running along the street where we live in the afternoon when traffic is minimal. It will be a challenge to keep on as the rain settles in for the season.

I have been using 3 of the bike attachments that are readily available for roadworking your dog:

Walkydog
K9 Cruiser
BikerDog

There is another called the Springer, which many people like; I think it looks cumbersome.

The Walkydog is simple---an easily removed rod attaches to a bracket on your seat post—it keeps the dog right next to you and attaches above the collar. There is a spring in the rod that absorbs the shocks, but because the attachment is higher up, it feels a bit less stable than the lower ones. I find the bracket comes loose easily and pivots, bumping into the back of my leg. I like having Maudie almost in heel position, but on the other hand, having her a bit behind feels safer.

The K9 cruiser attaches to the wheel hub and the frame bracket and puts your dog a little behind you, more at your heel. I like the lower attachment, but I think I like having her a bit more forward. It is sturdy and I think the safer of the 2 as well as being easier to ride with.

The Bikerdog I just got. It attaches to the rear frame of the bike and thus offers both a low attachment point and a more forward position. It also comes with a harness --basically a simple drafting harness—that seems comfortable and way safer for her than using a collar.

Several times we have encountered tempting distractions, but she has not been able to pull me off course or over. There is a nice amount of information relayed through feel and sound; I can feel her drifting out, or turning back to look at something, and I can talk her back into position. (I also have a collar and lead on her. I hold the lead in my left hand for a correction if need be). I can hear her breathing and what gait she’s in. I try to keep her at an even trot which means riding at a rate that is slow enough so that she need not break into a gallop, but fast enough to keep her moving along.

It is actually much easier than I thought it would be. I was most worried about my own stability and ability to steer a straight course, but it didn’t take very long to get my “bike legs” back and riding with her is quite smooth. She also seems to know what is required of her: “ready?” “Let’s go” “GOOD job” and “slow up” are the commands I’ve used successfully. She picked them up VERY quickly.

I’m interested to hear about others experience riding with their dogs. It's fun!

My New Love Interest

This is my new bike (long and not very interesting story, about switching back and forth until today) and I am vastly in love...!! I can just see Maudie and me cruising together with this one...up & down the hills yippee...!!

Its a Specialized Globe...with internal gears (8). Old technology made anew.

Alex the Parrot

A lovely tribute to the complexity of both Alex himself, and our relationships with animals.

Editorial Notebook New York Times
Alex the Parrot
By VERLYN KLINKENBORG
Published: September 12, 2007

Thinking about animals — and especially thinking about whether animals can think — is like looking at the world through a two-way mirror. There, for example, on the other side of the mirror, is Alex, the famous African Grey parrot who died unexpectedly last week at the age of 31. But looking at Alex, who mastered a surprising vocabulary of words and concepts, the question is always how much of our own reflection we see. What you make of Dr. Irene Pepperberg’s work with Alex depends on whether you think Alex’s cognitive presence was real or merely imitative.

A truly dispassionate observer might argue that most Grey parrots could probably learn what Alex had learned, but only a microscopic minority of humans could have learned what Alex had to teach. Most humans are not truly dispassionate observers. We’re too invested in the idea of our superiority to understand what an inferior quality it really is. I always wonder how the experiments would go if they were reversed — if, instead of us trying to teach Alex how to use the English language, Alex were to try teaching us to understand the world as it appears to parrots.

These are bottomless questions, of course. For us, language is everything because we know ourselves in it. Alex’s final words were: “I love you.”

There is no doubt that Alex had a keen awareness of the situations in which that sentence is appropriate — that is, at the end of a message at the end of the day. But to say whether Alex loved the human who taught him, we’d have to know if he had a separate conceptual grasp of what love is, which is different from understanding the context in which the word occurs. By any performative standard — knowing how to use the word properly — Alex loved Dr. Pepperberg.

Beyond that, only our intuitions, our sense of who that bird might really be, are useful. And in some ways this is also a judgment we make about loving each other.

To wonder what Alex recognized when he recognized words is also to wonder what humans recognize when we recognize words. It was indeed surprising to realize how quickly Alex could take in words and concepts.

Scientifically speaking, the value of this research lies in its specific details about patterns of learning and cognition. Ethically speaking, the value lies in our surprise, our renewed awareness of how little we allow ourselves to expect from the animals around us. VERLYN KLINKENBORG
»

Alex the Grey RIP ;-(

Today marks the passing of many souls and I add Alex, the wonderful African Grey to my list of goodbyes...

Famous parrot with big bird brain — and gift of gab — dies

Alex, an African Grey parrot with a knack for the English language, has died at age 31, apparently of natural causes.

The subject of a landmark study on bird intelligence, Alex had a vocabulary of more than 100 words, the New York Times writes in its obituary.

According to his Web perch (where there's a picture of Alex with his handler) he also could "identify 50 different objects, 7 colors, 5 shapes, quantities up to and including 6 and a zero-like concept." Research by Irene Pepperberg at Brandeis University was said to have "shattered the generally held notion that parrots are only capable of mindless vocal mimicry."

Her work showed that Alex had "the emotional equivalent of a 2 year-old child and intellectual equivalent of a 5 year-old."
Posted by Michael Winter at 07:51 PM/ET, September 10, 2007 in Animals/Pets | Permalink

Spinning Wheels

I’ve been hijacked on the bicycle caper and all my attention has focused on getting the right bike, the right seat, making sure I have the right SIZE, studying bike fit…wonder think type etc.

Its been so much fun cruising around that the whole idea of biking became really appealing, and I ended up going back to the shop and switching out my first pokey choice…or rather giving myself a decision to make between 2 bikes. The bike I like best needs tweaking to keep it from “mashing” me. I just ordered a new saddle to try out…

The bicycle I originally got for roadwork is comfortable, but for cruising this neighborhood in my current shape. 21 speeds on a lighter bike is easier than 7 on a heavier bike… And even though it is anatomically well suited, it’s not as fun. I like it, but I REALLY like the other…

I have to remember that I’m a casual rider who wants to roll alongside my dog….maybe do a bike path or 2 …and not a extreme biker….It’s kind of fun to try that hat on…but I want to return to earth now and get back out on the streets! Turn my attention back to getting ready to do road work correctly and safely.

I THINK I'm going to take the Pure back this afternoon....

early september....

...finally!!... crickets fill the dark with sound...i have been waiting for them since early august...

Road Work

I was walking by the window Sunday and glanced out to see a neighbor coasting down the street on her bike with her somewhat overweight..actually "thickened" better describes him...Chesapeake Bay Retriever trotting alongside. .....Ding! .....of COURSE!!...road work could be just the ticket.

I never feel like I can give Maudie enough of a workout. When we walk she paces alongside to keep pace with my fastest "natural" walk, and I just don't cover enough miles to make up for the ease of that exercise for her. I can get her to fly across the yard a few times, but it's a kind of steady clean aerobic stretch that she needs. I even considered having her pull something heavy along with us...

But being able to spend 30 minutes on a bike going just fast enough for her break out of that plod and into a trot would be great...

So...my latest research project has been bicycles, leash attachments...and of course, baskets in which a papillon or two can come along for the ride...

I think I found the bike I want and can afford; it's the color of french vanilla with a tan leather seat and hand grips, 7 speed, upright, forward pedal...I may go pay for it tomorrow after Flynnie and I get back from Vancouver where she has a chiropractic in the morning...

I had tons of fun test driving a few cruisers and that was one I really liked...

Lineage

Pedigree Generator (4 generations)
Browsing on sitstay.com for a leash attachment for a bicycle, I came across this pedigree generator. Just fill in the blanks and it will give you a formatted four gen pedigree. This can be especially handy for email…when my friends and I have talked about pedigrees, we have written tabbed lists that never quite work…

I’m reading Kristina Marshall’s book, Forever Friends: the Dogs of Sunnybank, and in the back she has a section of pedigrees that trace back to the Sunnybank collies through especially ubiquitous producers…most are Sires of Merit who produced in their offspring many successful dogs (thus they were used a lot).

Maudie goes back through quite a few dogs on both sides: Marnus Golden Ruler, Tartanside Heir Apparent, Gambit’s Freeze Frame. It’s pretty exciting to be able to follow that line so clearly. And her enormous charm and gravity seems very in line with those icons of colliedom immortalized by Albert Payson Terhune. ….

It’s another place where the legend acquires bones and walks….

Vick Protest

Ore. boy's Vick protest becomes Web sensation

Saturday, September 1, 2007
By DAVID KROUGH, kgw.com Staff

ALBANY, Ore. -- A young football fan from Albany got his dog an expensive chew toy -- and became in Internet viral video sensation all while working for a good cause.
After the Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick pleaded guilty to dogfighting, 13-year-old Tyler Reab decided he no longer wanted his football autographed by the NFL star.
But first, he decided to make the most out of the situation. Tyler got the football for Christmas in 2005.
The video of 1-year-old Otis chomping on the ball quickly became a hit on YouTube. Otis appears to have a grand time tearing the stitching off the ball and deflating it.
As of Friday, the ball had a bid of $650. And proceeds from the sale were being split between the Oregon Humane Society and a non-profit run by Tyler’s uncle. The Hope for Kids Foundation, run by Jason Cripe promotes after school programs for kids in Oregon.
“It was Tyle’rs decision to help us and keep this money raised from the football right here in Oregon,” Cripe said.

The Interview

You know those sequences in movies when the film goes into time lapse to indicate the passage of time and when it resumes regular speed, seem to be moving more slowly? That’s how this day felt.

Maudie and I went in for our interview/assessment this afternoon, slid downtown on our own melting…is more like it... it was so hot.

T came down into the lobby to fetch us and we went up on the elevator—one of the things that Maudie does not have a lot of experience with and that gives her pause. I was asked a series of questions about Maudie and about myself and our relationship while she settled in near my chair.

It takes her about 5-10 minutes to get comfortable in a new place, and she was hot, so her panting created the first impression, but, it was quickly evident that she was OK in an unfamiliar environment.

When we started to talk about interacting with strangers, it got interesting. Although Maude had a perfectly lovely encounter with a very sweet volunteer, she was uncomfortable with our interviewer and went into “is there someone else in this room with us? What other person?” mode. In short she moved away to lie with her back to T, did not respond to her invitations, paced around to me.

T has a lot of experience reading dogs and translated this to mean that Maudie wasn’t quite ready to interact with a lot of strangers; that she needed more ripening time and we should wait another 6 months to undergo the training. I kept juggling 2 voices in my head: 1) she wasn’t going to pass! She was not as outgoing as I thought and she will not like meeting all those new people in strange places. 2) Calm down, she just needs more experience, and no dog is perfect. The process just may take longer…

The conversation turned to how she deals with stress and uncomfortable situations. She turns away, either lies down, back to person, or leaves the room. T suggested that she probably goes flat---turns off----and that’s what she was doing. I expressed my surprise at Maudie’s behavior, because the Maudie I know loves to meet people, is not at all touchy and accepts a range of responses. But this is also where my knowledge sped up…and I saw Maudie more clearly. At home, where she is uber comfortable she is energetic enthusiastic and playful. In new situations where she is unsure, she pulls in and presents a very quiet picture. In fact, when I met her in Albany, she had that look; I read it as boredom. In fact she was hanging back and observing. She still likes to meet people, but in a more reserved way.

It strikes me just now that this seems very typical for a herding dog: confident but a little cautious, reserved with strangers, but not averse to new friends. Of course, the more experience she has with new friends, the more new friends she’ll be eager to collect. That she has that nascent desire is why she came to be with me on this journey in the first place.

Just as I was preparing myself to wait another 6 months to get started, Maudie walked over to T, wagging her tail, offering her Lassie paw and looking at her with “bedroom eyes” as Polly called them. Soon she was lying across her feet and letting her scratch her tummy. And T was reassessing. She said several times that she was on the fence…and in the end?

Long and short of it? We’re signed up to take the class in October. We can always pull back if she needs more time, but I do believe that we are ready to quicken our communication, leap into more experience and that we will rise to the occasion. And I left with the Delta training manual stuffed into my bag.

So. Huzzah! We’re on our way!

I couldn't resist...

and damn if it doesn't sound right!! (if I could be Polly Martin..;-)

Which Lassie Character are You?

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Maudie ges a bath

Today was bath day for Maudie...not a big deal, unless you haven't bathed a dog who weighs more than 25lbs in many many years! Of course she was a patient good girl; but like all dogs I know, she looked miserable while being tortured by soap and water and was equally ecstatic when she got out and felt how clean she was.

I lined the bathroom with towels, slapped the suction cup noose onto the tile, heaved her in and off we went....One side at a time, the bathroom turning into a sauna from the heat and the water and the breathing...

M helped me...kept her coat wet while I soaped her up with EZGroom (crystal white). Because she's a mahogany sable (my favorite color collie) it was fascinating to see the range of colors that showed up in her wet coat. Copper and black and mahogany and pale tan and grey and white..... I tried to imagine her a smoothie when she was soaked and her coat clung to her body, but I realized that I've never seen a mahogany sable smooth collie. I don't think they exist....Maybe there is not enough length to each hair to carry all those colors??

Then we brought the rocket powered dryer into the bathroom and dried her in the tub; I ended up climbing in there with the hose to get to all her parts.... still..... I let her go before she was totally dry, so now she's got a little cowlick on her back and she looks kind of fuzzy...I remember the corgis looked like that after a bath..

Its not quite as satisfying as washing a papillon who comes down off the grooming table all sparkly and silky and never looks better, every hair in place and glowing. With these double coated dogs, it takes a day or two for the oils to come back and the coat to settle down...unless of course, you spend the time drying and brushing until...well....they're dry! But she feels super clean and her whites are dazzling. It was SO hot today, I figured she'd dry off pretty quickly on her own. She did.

A preeeeety exciting day!? huh! Well, it is. Tomorrow we have our Dove Lewis interview.

I have such big hopes for us. There's no reason why we shouldn't do well, but I'm excited so I'm nervous. She's snoozin.

GusGus

Yesterday in class I watched M and Gus work on retrieving over the jump for a while. I am moved beyond...well... the moon, say....by Gus' desire to do right by M. He works so hard and with such focus. He is a special dog...
Lucky M, when Gus first came to live with us (I fell in love with him the first time I met him at my friend's house; he had just returned from the show circuit in Montana) he took one look at M and signed on for life. Pledged his mighty little papillon soul. Within the month he got his last major to finish his championship.
See how happy he is on M's arm....

la luna

Early early this morning, M woke me up to see the total eclipse of the full moon. It was a mostly clear dark sky, and the moon looked like an old penny. It was worth getting up for. Only visible way out west...

ah. writing...

There are always 2 struggles that go on for me when I write:
1.to write in my OWN voice &
2.to tell the truth on the whatever level I can find it.
But that is really only one struggle...isn't it. Can you really tell the truth in someone else's voice?
I suppose I might answer yes, if I were a fiction writer....but I'm not.

Titles and Descriptions

You can't be too obsessive about drafts when you write a blog...so I've turned my obsession full on the description under the title...watch it as it changes!!

Recap

When I began this blog, I was just starting on the journey of the 4th dog. An idea had surfaced about another way to serve, to do good, through a relationship with animals.

I have always believed that animals can guide us to our best selves; they model joy, courage and generosity. They can bring us smack into the present, back into our bodies, confer on us a sense of peace. But you know that....

I find myself wanting to embrace people with the same generosity. Like many of us whose lives revolve around animals, I have heard myself say how much more I prefer dogs to people. It was Suzanne Clothier who suggested that a lesson we should learn from our dogs, who love US unconditionally, is to also love us…our own species: human beings.

It was a natural progression to the idea then of therapy work. I could work WITH my dog to help people in various states of need. It is easy to love people who are vulnerable; in fact I think we love others best when they show us that vulnerability. A good place to start.

I started the blog thinking about breeds—probably my favorite pastime anyway—and learned a lot more about various spaniels, shelties, Bedlington and Manchester Terriers…

But when the fog lifted, the way was clear, and there at the gate was Maudie. This was late February. Since then, the focus has shifted to the bonding, the day to day, the next stage of this life together. The Art and Science.

The fact that I have a collie…a collie!!!!......again, has brought me fully into the present, into the possibility of more good work, and it has thrown yet another lifeline to that collie –obsessed girl I was….but more about that later.
(The Mythology. Meet: Albert Payson Terhune.)

Hands in pockets to feel the dust of the earth, eyes to the heavens.

The blog takes shape in the best way...it changes and grows.
___________________________________________________
That is a photo of Sunnybank Thane...handsome profile eh?!

Breakfast

I have been feeding a homemade and raw diet for years now...but recently found a kibble I can get behind. Orijen is grain free, Canadian made, and the company appears to have a sense of ethics. (My sense is that in Canada, farms are more important than corporations...I could be wrong...sigh...)

The dogs get this kibble in the am with some cottage cheese/yogurt and for supper they have raw.
When Maudie came to me, she was eating a pretty decent fish based kibble that she seemed to do quite well on, so I went searching for a similiar product of a little higher caliber (in terms of ingredients/company profile). That's how I found Orijen. Not only are all the dogs doing well, but they really LIKE it!! Even the papillons...the wee gourmands...(ewwww, I can't eat that, the tripe is touching the egg!!!)

I can talk about dog food all day, having spent QUITE alot of time reading, thinking and prepping around it. There are lots of good options. Here's one to add to the repetoire.

Flynn

I just added links to the side bar, and I’m sure the list will grow….

I want to talk about Flynnie and how miraculous she is. Her story is written elsewhere (not on this blog), but how she has chosen to relate to Maudie from the very beginning has really astonished me.

That very first time we all went down to KV with the papillons to meet Maude, I was mostly worried about Flynn. She has not had a lot of experience with large dogs except in class, whereas Sonny and Gus both grew up with a Golden and a sheltie mix.

So she was not fond of them. In fact when we would go visit the Bairds, and one of the big dogs was out on the stoop, she wouldn’t even go past her. I’d have to pick her up. The times she would go by, she ‘d go with her best “big dog what big dog?” face. They frightened and puzzled her.

So her reaction to this full-grown collie was key. Flynnie would tell me if she was safe or not, if I listened carefully.

And damn if she didn’t surprise me once again. Flynn was the least worried of the 3 papillons. At one point, I was sitting on the floor and Maude was lying next to me and Flynnie just marched right up next to her head to remind me not to forget her. She was not at all frightened, not even concerned. She didn’t appreciate Maudie’s lack of manners…trailing along with her needle nose up Flynn’s butt…but otherwise she was OK.

Now Flynn is no dummy. IN fact I’m still not convinced Flynn is even a dog, but an alien who hopped into a silky cute suit and came on down to earth to find me. She had to know that this giant hairy girl dog had claimed a piece of my heart, and she stood the very real proposition of having to share a little more of the house with her. Besides I had talked about it with her. So its not like she didn’t know what was going on.

Flynn is my first papillon, my familiar; she is my magic dog, the one who chose me, and claimed me for her own. Our devotion to each other is unwavering. But she has never, not once, showed the slightest resentment, jealousy or peevishness about Maudie. In fact, she’s the only papillon who tries to play with her. (Wisely, she will only interact in any active way at all with her when she is on a chair that puts her at Maudie’s head level.)

And frankly she’s always been like that. She is the unquestioned queen of the household, and she rules with such benevolence and generosity. She is always the first to warm up to visiting dogs…I believe she just has excellent hostess skills. This is her house after all.

The only part she does not like at all…is the part where she has to share me in training. At Ellie’s she pitches a monkey fit when she’s in her crate and I’m working with Sonny or Maudie. And I think it unnerves her to point of distraction.

As a result, I’m changing my schedule so that I take only Maudie one week and Flynn and Sonny the next. I WANT to only take one at a time…but then each has to wait so long to go next.
They all are in the midst of an important process too. Maudie and I are learning to communicate;
Sonny has another leg to earn for his CD and
Flynn just got a new set of articles…really cute tiny articles….Her first, my first.

It’s a full life…and it is just galloping by…

The Papillons

Soon...I need to talk about the papillons...my delicious French pastries, my silky aliens, my tiny Iditarod team, my half cat half collie models, my friends...

Cesar Millan

Last night I watched the first 8 episodes of Cesar Millan’s show, The Dog Whisperer. He has caused quite a storm in the dog world and as a public figure I’d say he is the American version of Barbara Woodhouse. In other words, he is influencing an entire generation of dog owners with his training ideology. There is furious debate about whether or not that ideology is sound, particularly in terms of its stress on dominance and submission.

I had to see for myself. And this is what I have to say about him….

1. At core he is working from a deep understanding of dog/human relations and it is the SAME one that ALL good trainers understand... Primary: dogs are not furry people* and many people are more focused on projections of their own needs for affection than the dog’s needs for a secure and happy life. They need constructive stimulation and trust in their owner’s leadership skills. In a dog’s world SOMEBODY has to be in charge. They want leadership more than they want “freedom.”

*Patricia McConnell talks about it this way in both of her excellent books**: People behave like monkeys and dogs behave like dogs. Communication is not a given, as we operate from different readings of body language. IE: We see hugs as signs of affection, and direct approach as respectful: they experience hugs as strangeness to be tolerated and direct approach as aggression.
**The Other End of the Leash
**For Love of a Dog

2. His approach to that understanding is very male. It is direct, get the job done with no f***ing around. He doesn’t care that the dog he just taught how to walk respectfully on a leash is frightened and stressed. Signs: tail between legs, drooling, licking of lips. I think he figures they’ll get over it. Where he barrels through a dog’s stress and discomfort, others might slow down, be more sensitive to what the dog is saying and offer more encouragement and positive reinforcement. It is a matter of leadership styles, positive vs. negative reinforcement, “male” and female” styles. (Not men vs. woman…plenty of women lead in a “male way”)

3. It also relies heavily on a vocabulary that needs examination. Dominance and Submission are very tainted words in our culture…we tend to see the submissive as OPPRESSED by the dominant. Master/Slave. Majority/Minority. Men/Women.

If we were to substitute the words Leadership for Dominance and Trust for Submission… we might see his work more clearly.

4. There was only one out of nine episodes where I saw him adapt and soften in regards to the dog’s needs. That was the visit with the Shih Tzu who refused to walk on a leash. He was firm, gentle and upbeat…and I heard him praise the dog. Praise is RARELY heard on the episodes I saw…He uses negative reinforcement to achieve balance…”When you submit, I will stop doing this uncomfortable thing.”

5. I am grateful. Yes, GRATEFUL, that he is so popular. I have never been able to walk my own dogs as comfortably, because I think a lot of people are taking his advice and controlling their own dogs out in the world. (Well…a lot MORE people).

6. More dogs are given up and destroyed from a lack of leadership, guidance and stimulation than from “cruelty” or “lack of freedom.” The dog relegated to the backyard and ignored is the dog who was not taught how to behave properly in the house, with the family. These are the cases we see him confront. I believe he has probably saved many many lives.

It is a mixed response. I think he does more good than harm. Still, I prefer the conversation that trainer Suzanne Clothier initiates with dogs...I wish SHE had a TV show! For now, her book, Bones will Rain From the Sky, will have to suffice.
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I love that in the title sequence of his show Millan says he wants to "share the knowledge he was born with." Maybe he was. Born with it. I'm still learning how to be that leader my dogs need. It is one of my life goals....

The Pre-Education of a Therapy Dog

Several experienced people have suggested that in order to raise the odds of getting a dog who will qualify for therapy work, I’d do best to get a dog….that is…not get a puppy.
With a dog, the temperament is more evident, and there are fewer surprises. Puppies grow and change; even the most outgoing youngster can develop quirks that you may or may not be able to work with. And if your heart, like mine, is set on doing this work, why NOT increase your odds?

Maudie is 2. I sometimes wish---with a powerful yen---that I had gotten her as a puppy. Watching a collie grow up is a wonder; they go through so many physical stages…weedy, fuzzy, and then they bloom into big gorgeous peonies. And of course, I would have loved to have known and grown WITH her. Dogs are with us for so short a time…it is a little pang that 2 years of her passed without me….

Nevertheless. I chose her---and she was chosen FOR me---because her solid confidence and gentle loving spirit are large, and had developed enough for us to able call those qualities dependable.

Her early life is somewhat of a mystery, but I know L & E did many things very right. Genetically, she is sound, and knock wood, healthy; the dogs behind her have good temperaments. She was exposed to enough stimulation and variety so that I have encountered very little that daunts her…she glides over metal grates, doesn’t flinch when something in the kitchen crashes, is eager to meet people, allows herself to be touched all over, tolerates the most uncanine-like human hugs, and has a foundation of listening to human speech enough to make around-the-house communication easy. (Go in; Go out, Wait, etc.)

So what have I been doing these 6 months while we waited to have the interview that will hopefully begin the process with Dove Lewis? Well, I take her to as many different places as I can, work in obedience (which is really just learning to communicate back and forth at a deeper level), ask her to meet and greet as many people as are willing. When someone admires her on a walk, I ask them if they’d like to meet her and facilitate a little exchange. (Her stunning good looks and collie aura at such times make me feel like the manager of a movie star…hee hee…Lassie legacy.)

I discourage her from jumping and climbing on people, and try to help her become more aware of where her body is in space.

But mostly, all this adds up to a simple preparation: we are learning to be a team, partners who go out into the world together to work, who can count on each other to keep them safe, who can speak clearly to one another. We are learning how to read each other’s moods and limits, how to cheer each other up, or calm each other down. She is mine. I am hers. We walk out together.

What I Know So Far

The days rise and fall, folding into each other and flying away like leaves off my car on the highway.*

(*It’s kind of funny actually…you can tell we don’t have a garage because my car looks like Pigpen from Peanuts …trailing great swaths of dead leaves as they dry and blow off at 60 mph)

The benefit of keeping up with a journal---or a blog—is that it somehow defines time enough to hold to. What WERE those first months with Maud like? What stories do I want to keep? Which ones will become fascinating little clues to who she is; which will show me how she has changed and grown?

This is what I know so far:

She came to us with impeccable manners, sitting to greet people, sitting to have her lead put on, walking very calmly right at our sides when we go out. On the grooming table she is a dream. She lies down to eat. She thoroughly enjoys the library of beds she has to lie on; she prefers stuffed toys or plastic bottles to play with; she doesn’t much like vegetables. She is a happy girl. She is, indeed, verbally gifted and will run outside just to bark her serious big bark. She paces when she is bored, and she paces on walks because we can’t go fast enough to keep her at a trot. When she lies down she heaves a great leonine sigh, like an old lady or an enormous male lion. She floats on her feet.

Sometimes when I’m getting ready for bed, the lights are off and everyone else is asleep, she’ll get up onto the couch in the living room just to see herself up there. Like trying on a hat.

It was quite easy to turn her opinion of the car around. At first it made her queasy and uncomfortable, but I took Flynnie, a handful of chicken and Maudie out into the driveway to sit in it for a few days in a row. And on the third day we drove to Burgerville and shared a burger and ever since…well...she loves the car. She rides quietly in the back in her crate and looks forward to our next adventure.


She is easy to take places, calm, unflappable, confident, and nice. She’s truly a nice person….friendly to MOST everyone. (It’s funny, if she meets someone I’m ambivalent about, she will often ignore them utterly.) She works the room and doesn’t get attached anywhere, although she has her favorites.

Thus, her loyalty is very touching to me. When she comes back to find me and check in, she is coming back to check on her partner. Yesterday, when we were visiting some smoothie cousins, at one point she lay down between H and me and laid her head on my sneaker. It was a gesture of ownership in the finest sense of the word….in the sense of belonging.

She is lots of fun to train, being very very bright and willing, forgiving and up beat. Best of all she has a sense of humor and I get her jokes. More and more we become a team, the lines of communication opening up wider. On our walks, she will sometimes put herself into heel position, like she’s asking me to dance.

One area of some consternation is that although she has the gentlest of souls, she is a bit clumsy and she seems not to understand the difference between her 60lbs and the papillons 8… indeed I think she thinks she might BE a papillon.* It requires some vigilance on our parts: we would never leave them all alone in the house, and when we go into the backyard, the papillons go first and get to arrange themselves before she goes barreling through the door.
(* think The Ugly Dachshund)

Another is my own adoration of her name. Maudie. I say it far too often in far too many situations so that she has begun to tune it out. (Like that cartoon….”blah blah blah blah Maudie blah blah blah”) It’s just that I LIKE it so.
But I need to work on that.

And so. Six months after her arrival we are preparing to go on our first interview at Dove Lewis to assess her temperament and our suitability as a team to do therapy work. I have high hopes…yes I allow myself to have them…as well as faith, that more useful and cogent of psychic states….that we will do well and start a new life together making the world a little calmer, a little more optimistic, a little more beautiful. She is a collie after all…she goes trailing beauty after her….

a s l o w summer for writing

I’ve dropped the ball, or the pen, as far as keeping up with the essays and blog this summer. Sometimes I wonder if when “one’s” heart’s desires are fulfilled, making dog collars becomes enough... But no worries. The summer is for making things and hanging out wordlessly with the dogs. In the studio. Training. Taking photographs. But here’s a small update:

Maudie was spayed in June and had was a remarkably FAST recovery.
She has been many places with me. Crowded openings, fabric stores, my classroom on finals day, visiting, city streets. She does not disappoint. She likes everyone she meets and conducts herself with dignity. Although she has developed a yen for meeting the dogs we encounter on our evening walks and that can make her a wild girl. We’re working on it.
She is learning to heel...I think the most difficult of all the obedience exercises....and her work with the dumbbell is rapid.
She has a depth of intelligence that surprises me; she is both eager to please and an independent thinker, as well as a sophisticated and hilarious comedienne.
I find working with her very comfortable...her steady good nature rubs off on me.
Meanwhile, the papillons, my little flutterbugs, also do well. Flynn amazes me with her generosity and intelligence. she is my fairy princess, my wise alien, my heart.

It is 6 months now since Maudie has been here, so it is time to get back to Dove Lewis and start prepping for the therapy work.
I'm not quite sure what KIND of work she'll most enjoy...Probably visiting a whole gaggle of people....wihtout llingering.
ALthough when I took her with me to school for the final day, she immedieatly stretched out on the floor for a nap...so maybe she'll be a good READ dog after all!

Why I Do Obedience

This tribute has been floating around the dog net for years now...but I still love to read it. It inspires me everytime. I would love to change, however, the pronoun "it" to either he or she...depending upon which dog the author had formost in her mind as she wrote....

I recently dug it out as Maudie and I have started training.

What is an Obedience Title, Really
by Sandy Mowery of Highland, Wis.

Not just a brag, not just a stepping-stone to a higher title, not just an adjunct to competitive scores, a title is a tribute to the dog that bears it, a way to honor the dog, an ultimate memorial. It will remain, in record and in memory, for about as long as anything in this world can remain. Few humans will do as well or better.

And though the dog itself doesn't know or care that its achievements have been noted, a title says many things in the world of humans, where such things count. A title says your dog was intelligent and adaptable and good-natured. It says that your dog loved you enough to do the things that pleased you however crazy they may have sometimes seemed.

And a title says that you loved your dog, that you loved to spend time with it because it was a good dog, that you believed in it enough to give it yet another chance when it failed, and that, in the end, your faith was justified. A title proves your dog inspired you to that special relationship enjoyed by so few; that in a world of disposable creatures, this dog with a title was greatly loved and loved greatly in return.

And when that dear, short life is over, the title remains as a memorial of the finest kind, the best you can give to a deserving friend, volumes of praise in one small set of initials after the name. An obedience title is nothing less than love and respect given and received and permanently recorded.

April 7

april 7

Spring is here and life becomes chaotic. The sky is filled with sprouts and the ground is soggy and emerald, all manner of green swords and pink cups appearing on the horizon and at our feet.

Maudie is pure pleasure. She is a collie: wise, gentle, funny, and modest. Everyday I see more of her soundness, that rock steady presence that has given me courage and energy to get out. Every night we go for a walk.

And yesterday, after a difficult first meeting with the long narrow staircase to Sharon’s office, we altered the plan and all went and sat by the river. Maude wanted to sit on Sharon’s lap, bury her head in mine. After a while she lied down between us and fell asleep. We chased a flock of Canadian geese away. She had on both her Roadie harness and her therapy dog vest.

On our way home, we stopped at Gabriel Park to see when the dog park would reopen so my girl could have a good lope…turns out there is a winter park. So we walked all around the back acres and through the woods, up the hill---the day was perfect—72 degrees and clear—to find a patch of dirt fenced in on a hill. I heard the screeching of a dogfight, as we got closer so I nixed the idea and we walked back on the trails. Through the special shadow of trees, on the gorgeous paths that lead somewhere, and sometimes over a brook or a bridge. My history came seeping back into my body like sunlight.

How many years I have wanted to go back into the woods..How many years have I forgone the pleasure thinking I had no place there? Did I know that it would take a collie to get me there? She has become my therapy dog, in service of getting me out into the world. When she is with me, I am unafraid, I am bold, I am curious. I just have to help my body catch up with the desire! These things alon are vest-worthy.

March 26

26 March 26, 2007

Early morning. I just returned from taking M to the hospital for day surgery. When I left it was dark; now the sun has come up just over the horizon. The morning is amazing. People are out walking with dogs or running or waiting for the bus and all the lights f the city are winking and in the houses on the hills people are getting up for work where one light burns. In some of these houses stacked and textured into the hills, tragedy is occurring and there is pain. But on the street all is cool promise; if you’ve made it this far out of bed, you’re on your way.

I took Flynnie with me and on the way home I drove into the Dairy to see the velodrome and the Little league fields and the Opera house; the Alpenrose compound is a cross between an army barracks, a fair ground and an historical museum. What is absent are the herds of cows, white and black on the greens. Now only the giant trucks come in from Tillamook with silver tanks of milk.

There I so much to say. Unexpected moments like when the new Lassie film arrives and I don’t even need to watch it because I have a collie. And then I think…I have a collie. My collie. And everyday is a day of revelations and promise.

All the dogs have settled back in to various postures of sleep around the table. It is just after 7. I could go back to sleep.

March 24

24 march

Went to the Dove Lewis AAT conference today. Lots of labs in their vests lying on the carpet in the meeting room…croissants and muffins and coffee and power point. It felt like a good place; the people with dogs knew who was on the other end of the leash and there was lightness and a sense of camaraderie and fulfillment. I longed to have Maudie there with me on her new therapy dog lead (!!!). IN 6 months we can interview and then take the class, then the test. I have no doubt that she will do really well. She is solid and loving and willing.

Tonight, she tried to squeeze herself into the papillon bed, like Olivia used to do, and it was hilarious, because the pap beds are big enough for her head only…but she was in there, scratching around and then spinning down…I got pictures…but they’re not as good as seeing her actually work to get in…

I have gotten off track writing. Getting up so early, having Maude, it has thrown me off…. I need to regroup. Sitting down, like now, at 145am isn’t going to work anymore…

Grow strong for walking.
Revisit the writing project and schedule.

March 23

In bliss there is a kind of silence…and in fulfillment there is darkness, a closing down. Or is it the change of seasons?

Here, by my feet, is my collie. I have dreamed of her all my life and now she is here. When we walk together, she glides silently next to me, but for the moment when she turns her head to bump my thigh, to say, hey. She is a happy girl, she is a gentle girl. She is a collie and all that has come to mean materializes in front of me. There is a wisdom that seems pecliar to the breed. A kind of insight about what is needed, a deep desire to do well, to be of service. It is in the size of her voice and her heart. She is a big dog much of the time, a lion, a whale…

Who are these dogs? Who figure so large in so many heroic stories? The science that says we made them through selective breeding suddenly seems like such a small idea…its more like they were always there, waiting to take form…and we only think we designed them…The truth is simply that we called them out.

Who is a truly a collie person I can’t be so arrogant to say that only those if us who spend our lives studying and working with dogs are the only ones…they show up in all kinds of houses, with all kinds of people, and who is to say that they are not on a mission? But I have seen them in the hands of collie people flourish and bloom like characters from King Arthur… chivalrous, virtuous.

She will teach me a lot about teaching. It’s a whole new game.


I want also to talk about Flynn and how she has responded to Maudie with nonchalant grace and humor. And tomorrow is the Dove Lewis conference…my first official foray into the world of therapy dogs…

March 21

21 march

We have past the one-week mark and I feel my own life changing. The weekend was spent driving back and forth to Albany with Sonny for that last CD leg…but it was not to be. He got up both days on his long down. On Sunday, barely 5 minutes from the house, 630am, I was trying to get a vial of pill curing down with some water and it all came up…all over me and the door of the car. I spent the drive mopping up, drying out, in some other world where the sun was coming up and I was floating through space.

But I have continued to evidence the energy and independence that have surfaced in the middle of this project. I think behind it all, my medication is working. I cannot imagine I would have driven that drive, 2 days in a row, by myself, and have gotten up at 530 to do it before.

Maudie. She is a person. Her age has somewhat solidified who she is, and she is no pushover. She is gentle, loving, calm, strong, intuitive, willing. All I might have wanted and more. She is big too…and has the demeanor of a lioness, much more so than a wolf…that gravitas is both ephemeral and physical. In her groan as she lies down heavily; the weight of her paw when she lifts it to me.

She likes it when we are all together. She does not much like the car. She has grown fond of her various crates and she seems particularly drawn to lie in the soft crate with the Critter Bed I picked up for her from Claudia in Albany.

I need to start forging a plan for more outings. The month is a time of settling in, but there is a kind of bonding in going out together. The car is key. I ordered a harness so she can sit in the back seat and maybe be more comfortable. I think she is very uncomfortable in the open square of the way back of the wagon…

Food is an issue much on my mind. I started out throwing too many new things at her, and now I am feeding her a kibble breakfast with yogurt, a spoonful of Gus’ canned and a probiotic. Supper is raw. I have a 10lb bag of Essex Cottage Farms I should make up some more and get her off the kibble…but there is a big bag of it to eat. I suppose we could return it…. or just stay the course we’re on until it’s gone.

It is finals week. I have a small stack of work to do and then I have a week and the selvedge of this week. I do need to plan 2 classes. This Saturday is the AAT conference hosted by Dove Lewis. 830am.

March 14

Still walking in a dream. I was thinking about a bumper sticker that says, “I may believe in Gd, but collies are my religion.”

I was thinking about my generation’s relationship to the collie via Lassie; the film the book, the TV show and WHY I think all those people on the road should gasp when they see her…The iconic collie.

And then that it was Terhune who solidified, cemented--all the wrong words-- ignited my passion for both the body and the character of the breed.

How many breeder bios mention those sources? Lassie and Lad? Almost all.
What is the relationship between the literature and the life? How all this brings me to this point: Maud and therapy work. Who would I rather see more if I were sick or lonely or depressed than a collie?

It would be a very very short list….

These are the next pages I need develop in this project. I have the year…to get it on its feet.

March 12 * Day 3

Today we went to Ellie’s. It was hectic; Maudie didn’t want to go into the soft crate and I didn’t have a plan to get her in…so Karen held onto her for a bit until she started “talking”…that collie moan and howl/whine. So I worked with her a little: heel position. (Just walk and when she looks at it…praise and treat.) Sit and Stand.
But not stay yet.
Body parts. Handle them and name them. We should do this every day.
Feet
Ears
Mouth
Tail
Hug
And then I put her in the car.
When I let her out before we drove home and she jumped back in when I asked, I was wildly happy. Something about the willingness and the power of this dog amazes me.

Sonny and I worked a bit…we have a trial this weekend. 8am. Albany.

As I was driving to and from Newberg, I was hyper aware of the fact that the people driving around me could see my collie. And what a gift that was to them. How insane with joy I would be to see that. Don’t you know I said aloud you are looking at the God-og? How lucky you are! It was then that I realized that collies are my religion.

I recall sharply the first time we went back into the kennel at KV and Leslie and Eva let Simon out t to meet us. He rose up on back legs, this enormous rough blue merle, and I said, “This makes me believe in GD.” L & E got that. They knew what I meant.

I discovered that I can ask her to “lie-down” from the driver’s seat and she will lie down in the back of the wagon.

*these are posts written on the title dates, but not posted until the blog date.

Maudie

Almost a month early we’re springing the clocks forward. So my body says 2 but my eyes say 3. We’re into Day 2 now and I can hardly believe how incredible this girl is. She slept in the car on the way home, came out tail wagging, peed in her yard, ate her supper, looked around. Slept all night without a peep…but an occasional moan and rattle of the crate as she re arranged herself.

So this is the collie. She pads around the house like a lion, and at times I feel like I’m deep in the ocean and she is a whale floating by. She is all restrained power and steady calm. She follows me around the house, but without the edge of fear. Maybe she is a little unsure, and knows me best. The largest and the smallest dogs are like my moons.

Flynn has her well in hand, Gus is slightly outraged and Sonny is overwhelmed by her bulk…but she has been very good about backing off. and about going outside and eating and chewing her chews…she even puts herself in her crate to rest. When she;s not sprawled out in the middle of the floor, an enormous beast, a fourth lion, a fourth wolf, a fourth gentle, otherworldy whale.

She trusts the world. She trusts people. She is confident and strong.
We are calling her Maudie-- My Audie-- to temper the “mighty in battle*” to mean “noble strength**” *Matilda of which Maude is a diminutive ** Audrey “noble strength”
Lindsay is too much like Flynnie and Lizzy, and I hope Leslie and Eva will like Maudie.

Here She Is

Home

March 9, 2007 11:20pm

I am bone tired and damp. Sonny is curled up on his blue bed near my feet and Lindsay is on the rug by the laundry door. I can hear her breathe. I look over and sure enough shake my head. A collie. A mahogany sable collie. My collie.

The story of the day.
It rained. I decided to take Sonny for the company and so at least one of the papillons would travel home with her. It was a drive I have thought of making many times over the last 6 years. Just me on an afternoon in the middle of the week.
The parts of the drive become familiar and are separating out now: the change on the I-5 after you go through Wilsonville and enter the valley and the landscape gets very horizontal and green . The trip through Salem and over the bridge, after which you are in rural Oregon, a little growth along the edges. 22 to 99Wsouth and then right where the ground swells up and sighs in great swaths of color, the fields inked over with rain or turned so green they are blinding; the ochre dirt the color of cooked pumpkin flesh and the coast range charting the horizon in blue shadows and cloud smears. The road becomes organic and it dips and curves like the hills themselves. It is breathtaking the way the green hill meets the full black clouds of rain coming, and yet somehow so anonymous…beauty without feeling; or maybe it is beauty without memory. No music from a tinkly amusement park rolling up and over the hills to meet. Although now maybe there is…
Then a left that takes you into the trees that fringe the foothills and then the sign that signals the return of ancient feeling KINGS VALLEY COLLIES. Like a mirage or a pot of gold or a gate to paradise. Up the hill then, narrow and black under the trees dipping and leaping higher into the hills. To the gate.
You stop the car, engine running and brake pulled and swing it open creaking and hollow and metal. Roll through. Close it. Roll down the hill to the chorus of collies.

But I get ahead of myself. Back in the middle lane of the I-5 I am breathing long draughts of breath and stretching the parts that will stretch looking for a calm place, if not the joyous place; keeping the car going straight. To think of even the smallest changes in schedule flip the panic switch…How will we eat supper?

Bt when I focus on her, the dog herself, I find myself grinning a tiny grin so small I have to look into the mirror to see if its really there. And it is, on the left side, a minute curve like a tiny seed in your mouth that feels 10 times bigger than it looks.

The pressure to feel a certain way, only now, at this moment, is absurd. Whatever it is I felt I will remember in the details of what I saw. And a buzzing on my neck, the empty fields. Friday traffic.

I am starting to fade…my eyes won’t stay open…more tomorrow…Now its time to get the girl in her crate and me into bed….